Review

• 12 Celebrities, thousands of critters, a smoothie full of gruesome intestines and a significant loss of dignity. What does that sound like? It sounds like a perfect reality show to give the British public a free pass to ridicule faintly recognisable, fallen-off celebs. It sounds like a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here (yes please get us out of this mortifying disaster of embarrassment). Apparently celebrities go on this show to find the real ‘them’ and showcase it to the public eye – yes, eating bugs in a jungle halfway across the world does that … 
• Am I the only one surprised  we ship off Celebrities to the middle of an Australian Jungle? Witness faces you usually see glamorously strutting down the red carpet now reduced to starvation and surviving a very disturbed sleep (I bet they won’t be getting their 8 hours in that place). Ghastly heat? Tick! Horrific creatures? Tick! Screeching birds and a toilet in a tiny wooden box? Tick! Tick! Tick! May as well be living in the slums of Mumbai. Faded stars trying to reclaim their fleeting relevance – on a voyage of self discovery and, if they’re lucky, gain a few pennies in their bank account.
• You will be left staring blankly at your screen asking yourself. ‘Who an earth are they?’ ‘What’s an influencer?’ The aim, it seems, is to last long enough and survive off dreadful gruel to get crowned King or Queen of the jungle. WOW! What an achievement. If you ask me prison would be a more enjoyable experience (at least you can use a proper shower there). 
• So to really glorify this razzmatazz of trash telly let’s look at some iconic moments that topped the ratings. How about Gillian McKeith fainting on telly from the sheer terror of having to do another bush tucker trial. Or how about Steve Davis loosing his footing at the start of the trial and tumbling into the pool of water beside him (even before the klaxon went off). Or even when Amir Khan and Lain Lee indulged in strawberries and cream behind there camp mates backs (I bet they weren’t the most popular in camp!).
• Now don’t get me started on the iconic duo; dumb and dumber, tweedle dumb and tweedle dee, Bat man and Robin. Ant and his smaller companion are armed with a whole host of sarcastic wit setting us up for endless, strained giggles and camaraderie(trying to lighten the mood whilst watching this tragic masterpiece) like a spectacle of a circus ringmaster. They know exactly what their audience is craving. But then it gets to joke, joke, joke, joke. You just stare at the screen blankly wallowing in depression wondering how they earn your yearly salary in one month.  
• Some people may deem this show as a towering achievement in the realms of reality shows. So, grab your popcorn, sit back and revel in the glorious plane crash of a show. Just remember however bad your day is you are NOT on live telly eating vile bugs to gain a few moments of relevance. Every cloud, right?