factors affecting attraction: self disclosure

• self disclosure

  the gradual process of sharing personal information and revealing the inner self to someone

  
  

  seen as basic feature of romantic relationships
• social penetration theory

  by Altman & Taylor (1973), is about how relationships develop (inc. self-disclosure)

  in romantic relationships, involves reciprocal exchange of information which displays trust

  more disclosure = 'penetrate' more into one another's lives
• what elements does social penetration theory involve?

  breadth and depth - seen through onion analogy
• what is the onion analogy? explain using: beginning, early, developing, later

  beginning stage: disclose lots of info (broad) but it is low-risk and superficial (no depth)

  early stage: must be careful of sharing too much info as revealing too much can threaten a relationship

  developing stages: self-disclosure increases in depth (removing layers of the onion) and the breadth of acceptable topics increases

  later stage: reveal high-risk intimate info at the core of the onion, e.g. painful memories, strong beliefs, secrets
• depenetration

  process of a dissatisfied partner disclosing less as they disengage from a relationship
• importance of reciprocity: Reis & Shaver

  to develop, needs to be increased breadth and depth of disclosure but also reciprocal disclosure

  in a successful relationship, will be a balance of self-disclosure between partners, increasing intimacy
• reciprocal disclosure

  involves one partner disclosing something about their true self and the partner responding in a rewarding/understanding and empathetic way with their own thoughts and feelings
• benefits of self-disclosure

  having more control of situations, identity-management (creating desired impression), potential for reciprocity, enhance/maintain relationship, catharsis (getting off your chest), clarification and talking things out
• risks of self-disclosure

  potential loss of influence/power, potential of being rejected, potential of creating a negative impression, revealing wrong things that decrease satisfaction, possible embarrassment, upsetting someone
• strength: research support for self-disclosure as a factor affecting attraction

  Sprecher & Hendrick: strong correlation between several measures of satisfaction and self-disclosure (from self and their partner) for hetero couples

  found relationships also closer and more satisfying when disclosure is reciprocal

  therefore, credibility
• counter crit for Sprecher & Hendrick:

  research is correlational only (no cause-and-effect)

  self-disclosure may not cause satisfaction - satisfaction may cause self-disclosure

  self-disclosure and satisfaction may be independent - there could be a third factor that causes both and simply makes them appear linked
• limit: cultural differences in the effects of self-disclosure

  breadth and depth of self-disclosure may not lead to more satisfying relationships in all cultures

  type of disclosure could be very important

  Tang et al: men & women in the USA make significantly more sexual self-disclosures (disclosures about feelings towards specific sexual practices) than men and women in China - no significant difference in satisfaction levels

  therefore, culture bound
• limit: conflicting explanations about the role of self-disclosure in relationship breakdown

  social penetration theory suggests intimacy increases and disclosures get broader and deeper, stating that relationship breakdown leads to depenetration (withdrawing disclosure)

  but other theories suggest relationship breakdown involves heightened disclosure - negotiation and discussion involving deep, intimate disclosures to try and save a relationship (e.g. Duck's phase model of relationship breakdown)

  reduces reliability (not consistent)
• strength: real life application

  romantic partners can learn to use self-disclosure deliberately and skillfully to increase intimacy - helpful to relationships built on small talk

  Hass & Stafford: 57% of gay men and women said deep, honest self-disclosure was the main way they maintained and deepened their relationship

  therefore, practical value