Grief and loss

• Grief


  Subjective emotions that are NORMAL response to the LOSS
• Types of loss based on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

  • Physiologic loss
  • Safety loss
  • Loss of security and sense of belonging
  • Loss of self-esteem
  • Loss r/t self-actualization
• Physiologic loss


  • Physical and basic need
  • Examples: Housing- burnt house, Amputation, "tomy"
• Safety loss


  • Unsafe
  • Examples: domestic violence, child abuse, bullying
• Loss of security and sense of belonging


  • Examples: Loss of a loved one, Relationship: breakup, divorce, Loss of a job
• Loss of self-esteem


  • Loss of value, "wala nang kuwenta ang buhay ko"
  • Factors could affect self-esteem: loss of a loved one, broken relationship, or retirement
• Loss r/t self-actualization


  • Unfulfilled, "wala nang pag-asa"
  • Examples: A person wanted to study but already accepted that it will never materialize, A person loses hope to have a partner
• Kubler-Ross Stages of Grieving


  • Denial
  • Anger
  • Bargaining
  • Depression
  • Acceptance
• Denial


  • Shock and disbelief: "doctor shopping"
• Anger


  • Anger towards others or tries to blame: "dahil sa kaniya kaya ako nagkakasakit."
• Bargaining


  • Asking a favor to fully accept the loss: "bago sana lumala ang sakit ko, makita ko muna siya."
• Depression


  • Happens at anticipatory loss: "Mamamatay din lang ako, hayaan niyo na akong mag isa."
• Acceptance


  • Fully realizing the loss: "Thy will be done."
• Engel's Stage of Grieving


  • Shock and Disbelief
  • Developing awareness
  • Restitution
  • Resolution of the loss
  • Recovery
• Shock and Disbelief


  • Numb feeling, and refusal to acknowledge the reality
• Developing awareness


  • Begins to acknowledge by crying or feelings of frustration, despair or anger
• Restitution


  • Rituals like wake, ceremonies, tribute like eulogy, family gathering
• Resolution of the loss


  • Preoccupied with the lost person/ object, or reminiscing
• Recovery


  • Preoccupation ends, and start to move forward
• Task of Grieving (Rando, 1984)

  • Recognize- reality
  • React- feeling the feelings
  • Recollect and re-experience- memories
  • Readjust- returning to the usual life
  • Reinvest- accepting changes: new relationship and commitments
• Philippos Syrigos: 'Pain never really goes away; you just elevate and get used to it by growing stronger.'