Romantic Relationships

• The evolutionary approach argues that males and females are subjected to different selective pressures, which lead them to use different strategies to maximise their reproductive potentials.
• Sexual selection involves natural selection of characteristics, increasing the chances of success.
• Reproductive success involves the production of healthy offspring, surviving to sexual maturity and then reproducing themselves. This leads to different sexual behaviours due to anisogamy.
• Anisogamy refers to the difference in the number of gametes (sperm and eggs) being produced.
• Inter-sexual selection is when members of one sex evolve preferences for desirable qualities in potential mates. Members of the opposite sex who possess these characteristics will gain a mating advantage over those who don’t. The preferences of one sex therefore determine the areas in which the other sex must compete.
• Intra-sexual selection is where one sex must outcompete other members of their sex in order to gain access to the opposite sex. Successful individuals are able to mate and pass on their genes. Therefore, the individuals who have successful characteristics become more widespread in the gene pool.
• Women have less sex cells and therefore have to be more picky over who they choose as they will have to raise the child.
• Buss (1989)


  Aim: to find out what males and females look for in long-term partners

  Method: asked over 10,000 people from 37 cultures to rate 18 characteristics on how important they would be in choosing a mate.

  Findings: women desired men with good financial prospects.

  men placed more importance on the attractiveness of women (although women still value this trait).

  men universally wanted women who were younger.
• Strengths of Sexual selection

  • There is research to support the idea that women are choosier than men, for example, Clark and Hatfield (1989) found that no women agreed to a proposition whereas 75% of men agreed immediately.
  • Support for desirable characteristics comes from research.
• Weaknesses of Sexual Selection:

  • A problem is that cultural differences may be more important than evolutionary forces. Bernstein (2015) found that women are more likely to look for security and economic resources due to historical denial of economic and policy power for women in many cultures.
  • There are potential problems with studying mate choices. This is because in study’s such as Buss, we are asking people to indicate their preferences rather than identifying what actually happens in real life.
• Self-disclosure is giving information about yourself to other individuals, specifically in relationships, when a person reveals intimate personal information about themselves.
• Social penetration theory (Altman and Taylor, 1973) argues that gradually revealing information, emotions and experience about yourself and reciprocal sharing leads to greater understanding and trust.
• Self-disclosure is an important aspect of developing a romantic relationship, with greater disclosure this leads to greater feelings of intimacy.
• People tend to prefer those who disclose intimate details to those who disclose less about themselves. Furthermore, the more you like a person, the more you disclose to them and you like people who have revealed intimate information about themselves.
• Reciprocal sharing is the belief that if that if we share something about ourselves, we expect someone to return with a piece of information of similar weight.
• Social penetration theory uses an onion metaphor to describe self-disclosure. It suggests that at first people often share lots of information about certain aspects of themselves (breadth), but consider some topics to be off-limits (depth). As they build trust in their partners understanding, the breadth increase and then the depth also increases.
• Sprecher et al (2013) - Procedure

  • 156 undergraduate students from a US university, who were paired together.
  • 2/3rds were female-female, 1/3 male-female.
  • Each pair did not know each other.
  • In the reciprocal condition, the pairs immediately took turns in asking questions and disclosing.
  • In the non-reciprocal condition, one person asked questions in the first interaction, while the other self-disclosed, then they switched roles.
  • After each interaction the researchers assessed: liking, closeness, perceived similarity and enjoyment of the interaction.
• Sprecher et al (2013)- Findings

  Individuals in the reciprocal conditions reported more liking, closeness, perceived similarity and enjoyment of the interactions than those in the non-reciprocal groups. This shows that reciprocal sharing leads to greater feelings of attraction to the other person. In particular, that turn taking is an important feature of reciprocal sharing and more likely to lead to positive interpersonal outcomes.
• Strengths of self-disclosure

  • it can help couples who want to improve communication in their relationship
  • there is evidence to support that sharing information helps strengthen a relationship
• Weaknesses of self-disclosure

  • there may be differences in patterns of self-disclosure
  • women are much less consistent in the type if mate they choose than the theory suggests and therefore evolutionary factors may be more important.
• It has been shown that, men in particular, place great importance on physical attractiveness. Therefore, one factor affecting attraction is the number of desirable physical characteristics a person has. Men and women look for different physical qualities which gives an indication of a person’s chance of successful reproduction.
• Physical features for men:

  • height
  • muscles
  • facial hair
  • jawline
  • clear skin
  • symmetrical face
• Physical features of women:

  • big eyes
  • petite bodies
  • small nose
  • clear skin
  • long hair
  • symmetrical face
  • hip to waist ratio
• Why is physical attractiveness important to men?

  • need to know women are old enough yet young enough to have a child.
  • need to know that women will survive childbirth and raise their child and pass on their genes.
• Why is physical attractiveness important to women?

  • childbirth is risky and can result in death so women need to know that genes passed on help children to survive
  • children don’t have great immune systems so need set of genes to help help them avoid death
• The Halo Effect


  Individuals seen as physically attractive tend to create a favourable impression of possessing desirable personality characteristics. For example: trustworthy and optimistic. This is an example of the self-fulfilling prophecy.
• The Halo Effect - supporting study


  Dion et al (1972) asked women to read reports of severe classroom disruptions by elementary school children. In some cases, the report was accompanied by a picture of a very attractive child, whilst other times it was accompanied by a picture of an unattractive child. They had to decide on the punishment they would give the child. Attractive children were excused from the behaviour whereas unattractive children were blamed and seen as “brats”.
• The Matching Hypothesis


  This can be defined as those who are of similar levels of physical attractiveness to each other are more likely to form romantic relationships. When choosing a partner, an individual first assesses their own value in order to identify the value of a potential suitor. Although people may be initially attracted to people who are the most socially desirable, we often opt for people who are similar levels of attractiveness to ourselves, in order to maximise their chances of a successful outcome.
• Strengths of physical attractiveness theory

  • there is research to support sex differences in the importance of physical attraction. Meltzor et al found that objective ratings of wives’ attractiveness was positively correlated to levels of husbands satisfaction at the beginning of marriage and four years after.
  • There is an explanation for why research often fails to find evidence of matching in terms of physical attractiveness. Sprecher and Hatfield (2009) suggest a person might compensate for a lack of physical attractiveness for other desirable characteristics such as a personality/kindness.
• Weakness of physical attractiveness theory

  • the matching hypothesis may not be that important in initial physical attractiveness. Taylor et al (2011) found no evidence that online daters decisions were driven by a similarity between their own and potential partners’ physical attractiveness. Instead they found evidence of overall preference for attractive partners
• Filter theory suggests we chose romantic partners based on a series of filters that narrow down the field of available partners from which we might eventually make our choice.
• Filters of Formation:

  Social demography - there are a wide range of factors that lead to potential partners meeting in the first place, e.g. geographical location and education. The outcome of this is homogamy, the idea you are more likely to form a relationship with someone who is socially or culturally similar to you.
• Filters of maintenance:

  • Similarity in attitude - people start to identify people with similar values and beliefs. Kerchkoff and Davis found this tends to be important in the first 18 months. There is a need to agree over basic values and beliefs in the early stage.
  • Complementarity - people who have different needs like each other because they provide each other with mutual satisfaction of these opposed needs. Kerchkoff and Davis found that long term couples found this trait more important than the others.
• Strengths of Filter theory:

  • There is evidence to support filter theory from Kerchkoff and Davis performing a longitudinal study on 94 couples and carrying out two questionnaires, measuring similarity in attitudes and values, and the degree of complementarity.
• Weaknesses of filter theory:

  • filter theory may be wrong in assuming that similarity is important, instead perceived similarity may be more important.
  • complementarity may not be important. Dijkstra and Barelds found a strong correlation between the personalities of both partners.
  • the theory may lack temporal validity as Thornton and Young found evidence of changing attitudes towards relationships in young Americans over the decades.
• Social exchange theory (SET) suggests that both partners must perceive that they are continually giving and receiving items of value to and from one another. As relationships are fundamentally selfish, relationships only continue if both members feel they are getting something out of it.
• Profits of relationships can include:

  • financial security
  • affection
  • emotional support
• Costs of relationships include:

  • time (listening to others problems)
  • buying presents
• People exchange profits and costs in the hope that they will gain a profit in return for their costs. We weigh up the profits and costs, and if the profits are more, the relationship is maintained.
• Comparison levels are a way that we measure the profit in a relationship. It is how much reward that you believe you deserve based on our self-esteem or from social norms which is often found through social media and TV shows. Our comparison level changes as we acquire more data. Someone who has had a poor or unsatisfying relationship will have a low comparison level and will therefore be more likely to expect less from another relationship. A relationship will have a higher degree of happiness is both people believe the profits are above their comparison levels.